submitted on01 Feb 2009
up votes327
down votes123

(93877 subscribers)

a community for 3 years

TheRussianFunk 116 points 11 hours ago[-]

Only SLIGHTLY not safe for work?!

oyok2112 25 points 9 hours ago[-]

Totally, pictures of naked women sucking on blurry flesh-colored rods qualifies as "slightly NSFW" to me. Now, naked women sucking on PENISES? Very NSFW.

RepeatingSpooginator 32 points 11 hours ago* [-]

Maybe he works in a porn shop.

Every other workplace that has an actual HR department, or sensitive employers, will consider that offensive.

I learned long ago to just accept that Reddit is NOT safe for work. Unfortunately, this was after clicking through to some HIGHLY NSFW material. I'm sure that link is attached to a personnel tracking file, waiting for the day they want to fire me.

However, I still don't Reddit at work, as a coworker might get offended with what comes up on the screen. That will get me fired immediately. The former case will get me fired when my performance goes down or I offend a coworker. Which is hopefully later.

[edit]: Reddit is NOT safe for work.

tankd0g 15 points 8 hours ago[-]

It's pixelated, therefore it's ok. Just ask Japan.

alex4nder 7 points 10 hours ago[-]

The mosaic patterns were added manually.

sarevok9 3 points 6 hours ago[-]

When you mouseovered the url and saw 'blowjob.htm' and 'slightly nsfw'...I'm not saying the poster is right... but it could've been worse.

TheRussianFunk 1 point 6 hours ago[-]

You're absolutely right, you win this one, good sir!

ymbwithvd 5 points 10 hours ago[-]

Well, they did blur out the wieners...

timmaxw 4 points 10 hours ago[-]

Low-resolution with the raciest parts blurred.

pn6 1 point 5 hours ago[-]

You didn't have it installed.

Lord_Gnome 37 points 12 hours ago[-]

I wonder whether you could use it to find free porn sites that you didn't know about.

boozinf 4 points 9 hours ago[-]

now that's a moral hazard.

judgej2 40 points 13 hours ago[-]

Yes, those really are pictures of a woman with a cock in her mouth.

lilsis 21 points 12 hours ago[-]

isn't that illegal?

ffualo 97 points 11 hours ago[-]

Palin lost dude.

Laminar 12 points 7 hours ago[-]

That's a load off...

anonymousbastard 1 point 28 minutes ago[-]

Somebody choke me a little bit and I'll get one off too...

supaphly42 9 points 10 hours ago[-]

Technically yes, in some states.

mellisy 10 points 10 hours ago[-]

Wait, those are cocks? Ah, okay, the manually-added mosaic patterns were throwing me off.

klaengur 15 points 9 hours ago* [-]

"This anus detector (asshole detecting software) can be used to locate anus/asshole from images"


MihaiC 8 points 6 hours ago[-]

But it will not work on goatse!

AndreTI 16 points 11 hours ago[-]

This is actually quite intriguing from a machine-vision standpoint.

arnar 11 points 8 hours ago[-]

The demos don't look very convincing, they're only a handful of pictures, rotated in increments of 90 deg and mirrored.

fuzzybunn 19 points 12 hours ago* [-]

Ok, I think I understand now. Despite the somewhat creepy research being done here, the motivation for this is actually quite reasonable. From


  1. Parental Filter: In this case, PornSeer Pro can be an advanced parental control filter that enables you to block porn images and videos from your web browser.

  2. Anti-Porn. In this case, PornSeer Pro is an automatic content filter software to protect your kids from pornographic images and videos.

  3. Block Porn In this case, PornSeer can smartly block regions of Porn in an image or each frame of an adult movies.

I guess to protect kids you gotta know be able to detect what you want to protect them from...

Uiaccsk 69 points 12 hours ago[-]

I feel like this technology will just filter out all the conventional porn and let the really freaky shit slip through the cracks.

IOIOOIIOIO 28 points 11 hours ago[-]

It's about time someone came up with a market force to make the US catch up with Japan.

Uiaccsk 3 points 11 hours ago[-]

The freaky porn war has never been even close to within the US's grasp. Were such a bunch of freakin Puritans.

octony 5 points 9 hours ago[-]

I'm waiting for the upcoming version that has the automatic goatse and tubgirl detection.

fishbert 16 points 7 hours ago* [-]

kids are more resilliant than anyone gives them credit for. I don't see the need to "protect" kids from internet porn.

I wasn't "protected" from porn when I grew up, and I'm perfectly happy now with my double-amputee, gimp, furry, midget, sex slave in the basement, tied in a compromised position to a triple-pronged, homemade fucking apparatus. I can almost hear her now... through the silicone cock in her mouth.

So happy.

AndreTI 24 points 11 hours ago[-]

I'm reminded of a Dilbert cartoon where Dilbert tried to write a porn filter.

"Oh yeah, it should be easy. I mean, it's my coding against millions of horny teenagers. Easy-peasy."

rastasitar 1 point 5 hours ago[-]

If you were a kid and you saw a blurred penis would you really not know what it was? I hate this pseudo-child friendly shit. If they are looking at digitally scrambled porn, they are already dirty.

Codebender 2 points 8 hours ago[-]

They're playing both sides, though:

This technology can be used in automatic porn detection, porn removal, porn blocker, ..., automatic porn video preview generator.

chimpout 1 point 9 hours ago* [-]

It's called being a parent instead of letting a piece of software do it for you.

tyywebb 2 points 1 hour ago* [-]

Bandwidth limit exceeded.

Oh it's real alright!

chopenik 5 points 7 hours ago* [-]

Dude with pixelated d**s get all the chicks. So unfair. :(

squegie 3 points 6 hours ago[-]

I think that you can get that done surgically.

xAnarkix 4 points 5 hours ago[-]

In Japan.

ShrimpCrackers 9 points 9 hours ago* [-]

Please tell me this IS real, think of the applications.

Porn has always led the way. I mean derivatives of this technology could be applied to robots, AI, sensors, augmented reality, and so forth.

Look at the movie Minority Report. When those little home-invasion robots were deployed, they can now tell the difference between someone stabbed, having sex, or wielding a pan and assess threats.

Or maybe if your Roomba can tell that you're having sex, it'll get out of the room.

Aeiri 6 points 5 hours ago[-]

Or maybe if your Roomba can tell that you're having sex, it'll get out of the room.

Then what will Buster use to play with himself?

rainergamer 2 points 4 hours ago[-]

A thousand upmods, because I'm re-watching this show.

The links are dead every few episodes, so I think I'll have to buy the sets.. it will be the only set I've purchased, aside from every Futurama season + movies.

It is that good.

General_Hilarity 4 points 8 hours ago[-]

Or maybe if your Roomba can tell that you're having sex, it'll get out of the room.

"Wait, where are you going? No no no ... hang on a sec...let me..Arghh... ouch!!!"

txstoploss 1 point 2 hours ago[-]

Oh yeah, I can't wait for this to be applied to something that can get me fired / jailed / killed. There's so much history of flawless software operated by un-corruptible non-psychotics.

ragweed 10 points 11 hours ago[-]

Imagine the poor blowjob-desensitized bastards that wrote and tested this code.

rockintom99 22 points 11 hours ago[-]

Sucks to be them.

tyler2k 10 points 9 hours ago[-]

I agree, it must leave a bad taste in their mouth

IOIOOIIOIO -4 points 11 hours ago[-]

Not necessarily. You could set it so it would skip the 20 minute blow job intro and get straight to the good stuff.

millinao 3 points 10 hours ago[-]


IOIOOIIOIO 1 point 9 hours ago[-]

Nah, I just am tired of reddit pun threads.

boozinf -1 points 9 hours ago[-]

That deliverable was a bit hard to swallow.

squegie 3 points 6 hours ago[-]

Don't worry it's fake.

You can tell by the shadows and the pixelation.

embretr 6 points 9 hours ago[-]

I found the vulva detection software, to be just about as funny.

ideonode 3 points 7 hours ago[-]

Physicallinguistics? Ah, come on, that's just crying out for a cunnilinguistics gag.

miketheburrito 1 point 6 hours ago[-]

Haha. Gag.

Milesp707 2 points 6 hours ago[-]

Definitely likes his asians...

bondolo 1 point 2 hours ago* [-]

My favourite is this one: "Degree of porn over time"

lucasvb 5 points 10 hours ago[-]

But can it detect facials?

Araya213 1 point 3 hours ago[-]

What's this guy got against blowjobs?

squidfartz 1 point 4 hours ago[-]

Just wanted to say I am genuinely sorry about the inadequate warning. I thought the blurred images wouldn't qualify for considering links I have clicked here that had no warning at all. I did mean well and will make sure to put full NSFW warnings on future posts where it applies. My bad.

potatogun 1 point 4 hours ago[-]

Did anyone notice the cowgirl sex position detector...

newgenome 1 point 5 hours ago[-]

Yeah, there's big money to be made in filtering out porn from the internet get over it.

devision 1 point 5 hours ago[-]

Couldn't we use this to automatically categorize massive porn libraries?

xAnarkix 2 points 5 hours ago* [-]

Not until it can detect what is going on in a scene. Think of the possibilities. Finding your exact niche without having to rely on tags added by others...

"Search: Massive gangbang with at least 5 hermaphrodite midgets wearing diapers"

"Found: 2 results"

frickthejews 0 points 6 hours ago[-]

The mosaic patterns were added manually. The mosaic patterns were added manually.

ropers 2 points 10 hours ago[-]

Please tell me this isn't real

Why not?

regularfry 1 point 6 hours ago[-]

I say real. Probably using Haar cascades, if you want something googleable.

luckyvanessa 1 point 7 hours ago[-]

Mouth-suck-penis blowjob.

mistercow 1 point 8 hours ago[-]

It seems like these demos never show what happens when you feed it a picture of, say, a car, or a merry-go-round. The ability to detect a blowjob in a picture, knowing that it's a picture of a blowjob, is useless for porn detection

tesseracter 1 point 7 hours ago[-]

it would blur the pole that goes through the horse on the merry-go-round, not that that is entirely unreasonable -- its called a "merry" go round, and there are horses going up and down on poles. maybe it should be censored :-P

Kitchenfire 1 point 9 hours ago[-]

Leave it up to the Chinese to figure out how to better censor.

mrmoney 0 points 9 hours ago[-]


thewriteguy 1 point 10 hours ago[-]

what i always wonder -- why are there so many people even surfing the net at work? get back to work you lazy bums! :)

Tatsuma 16 points 9 hours ago[-]

My code is compiling

nargi 0 points 7 hours ago[-]

I would definitely not be using this for its intended use.

M0b1u5 0 points 7 hours ago[-]

It seems real.

It also seems retarded.

docgravel 0 points 8 hours ago[-]

You know someone at Google has dedicated their whole life to a nipple detection algorithm for moderately safe search...

ChefOfSin 2 points 7 hours ago[-]

That would be the Nipple Identification Program Software...or N.I.P.S for short

Epistaxis 0 points 8 hours ago[-]

Automatic porn detection? Damn, they're going to put me out of a job!

anarchistica -1 points 9 hours ago[-]

Awesome, bjs are boring to watch most of the time anyway.

n-space 0 points 10 hours ago* [-]

Someone had to make this software. That seems like a pretty awesome job. Especially when you have to test the program.

Illah 0 points 10 hours ago[-]

You seriously even doubt this software exists? How do you think YouTube keeps its site from turning into YouPorn? It's not because they have 100,000 monkeys watching videos 24/7.

supaphly42 15 points 10 hours ago[-]

It's not because they have 100,000 monkeys watching videos 24/7.

They do, it's called their audience. Check the comments on there if you don't believe me.

arnar 5 points 8 hours ago[-]

Hey, that's not a nice thing to say about monkeys.

hannuraina 0 points 10 hours ago[-]

source on the brown hair chick in the first image

middlename 1 point 10 hours ago[-]

It's for blowjob detecting software. I just look at my dick and if there is a colored ring, I've has a blowjob. Or my ringworm has returned.

skizmo 2 points 9 hours ago[-]

your cockringworm ?